Saturday, July 23, 2011

Setbacks aren't always a bad thing

So, I just keep trying to keep positive about all the crap I've had to deal with since getting sick. All the "two steps forward, ten steps back" shit is really getting old though. But, in getting setback my doctors can better help me move forward eventually. I just have to keep optimistic about all this.
It's not easy to be my old optimistic self lately though. Through the constant vomiting, and then the vomiting blood; the chronic aches and pains; and especially the fatigue that is far worse than it ever was before.
I've been pushing myself harder and harder to accomplish things throughout my day, instead of staying in bed like my body wants me to. I may end up paying for it in the end, but at least I have something to show for it!!

So, I bathe even when I really don't have the energy for it; I do laundry once a week; I attempt to make the bed every day; I stay on the couch instead of in bed most days; and I'm crocheting a new blanket for the bed. All this plus spending time with an energetic nine year old!! I'm trying to do all I can, and although it's killing me; its also very worthwhile in the end. It helps boost my self esteem back up almost to where it was before. I don't feel like such a worthless schlub every day.

Thursday, July 14, 2011

It's been a while

It's been quite some time since I've been on here to let you know how things are going. It's been a busy and crazy summer so far.
Clay had a trip to the ER and we found out he had mono. This was literally days before he left for a 3 week camping adventure in upstate New I was frantic and worried.
And joy of joys, Sonny proposed to me on the 22nd at 12:15am. I was caught completely off-guard (which is hard to do to me). I'm so blessed to have such a wonderful fiancee!!!! He's the best! I love him ever so muchly!!!
I finally found out that I do not have Lupus (yet). That's right, yet. It's an Undifferentiated Connective Tissue Disease. My rheumy is so nice!! My pain management doctor is a jackass at times though. He ended up putting me on morphine sulfate, and the dosage he prescribed was actually enough to land me in the ER for an overdose. Yup, had to miss Sonny and my Harley riding & camping weekend to stay home sick. But, we figured out what dose I can safely take and not end up sick or o/d again.
Oh, and that weekend I stayed home sick and went to the ER??!! Well, that's the weekend I spent babying our 16yr old cat after the $400 vet visit from her episode of constipation.
Then the nightmare of all nightmares - cleaning Clay's disaster area that is actually his bedroom. Man, this was seriously the worst project to undertake while I'm going through so much physically and emotionally. But, we're making head-way and we actually found the floor in his room last evening!! How pathetic is that??!!
Tonight we get Clay back. I'm so excited to see him!!

Like I said, it's been a busy and crazy summer.